Silence of vacuum!!!

GIM was a familiar place for me… the years of working there had made me known to GIM and GIM known to me so much so like my own home.. Not only the geography but also the populace, the smiles, the stares, the classified idiots, the politics, the economics and what not….

That is until I walked into the Kings cabin that day… Remember I had knighted myself NEW AND IMPROVED and with an impudent disdain had walked into the Kings cabin that evening,,,,

Welcome Sukesh Menon… announced Dr Joy when I walked in….

I wanted you to meet Professor Mathew Cherian , who will be joining us today… he said even as I was about to sit on a chair opposite to the King in his larger- than- the- oval -office cabin…

I hadn’t seen the guy until then, the sort of a semi old man with a notable face, a well combed extra oiled head and a dressing style that gave an impression at the very first glance.

Hello… he extended his arm to me and I did mine …..

He is professor Sukesh Menon.. said the King to the visitor…. teaching Marketing and also taking care of various other activities that are key to this B school….

I had a smile.. a real one this time that I was being praised by the king himself…

I was being acknowledged as the one who takes care of activities that were KEY to the B school..

By the way.. Sukesh… he would be the new head of the department of Marketing… Said the king as if a revelation…. You would be happy at this new arrangement….

Was I happy?

I didn’t know… I wasn’t unhappy for sure and even thought of the devil that was the ED and to whom the hapless faculty of GIM reported to….At least now there is this cushion called the HOD…..It was new to GIM… till that day the ED was the academic head and he was the bridge or the barrier (case to case it varied) between the faculty room and the HQ…

I still had a wonder pasted in my eyes as to why I was called to the king’s chamber… It surely would not be to introduce me to my new HOD ..Prof Mathew cherian…

How is the EMEP activity going? .. asked the King…

I wasn’t prepared for the question but had a ready made answer, now that the delegation was done and it was finally taking shape…

Since Anand mohan would not be available for some time, hope you would have made alternate arrangements … said the King ….

I didn’t like the statement…

Did he entrust me with the EMEP because Anand Mohan was with me and hence I could and would do it?

Was it for the abilities of Sukesh menon that he got the job or for his proximity to the man who had come, conquered and disappeared?

Yeah sir,,,, I said… but …

I know….. added the king in haste… I know it’s not easy to fill in the vacuum created by some one like Anand… but its fate,,, what can we do…?

He turned back and looked into the serene face of Lord Jesus Christ in a picture that hung from the wall. He sat there as if in meditation and even the guest, Prof Mathew joined him and I, with the silence deafening and threatening me sat there exchanging a not so serene glance at the lord…….

I have a lot of plans for you.. said the King as he came back to his bossy self… Lord Jesus still had the smile and tranquility in his face and I couldn’t help but keep seeing it…

We will discuss it in detail later… now can you take Prof Mathew to the faculty room?…

That again was new… it was the ED’s job to carry around any new entrants and introduce them to the rest of them… no one did any honours when people resigned and left GIM… either they left silent, or they did with lot of acrimony but honours were missing almost every time…

ME? … I asked in an unbelievably loud voice…

The king laughed, adjusting his large body in the larger than anyone's imagination chair which protested and grumbled and said…yeah .....you… I told you I have some plans for you….

Prof Mathew handed over a piece of paper to me on the way, which was his profile, his credentials, his travels, and degrees, his writings and articles and all the stuff which a typical arm chair academic will flaunt around with brazenness … I smiled with a spoof that was obvious to me but not to him which I could see from his grin …

I didn’t like the Royal messenger’s job but had to do it… the victorious look with which I carried myself into the chamber had lost in transit by the time I reached back the faculty room with the new HOD and his self advertising document which he expected me to read it to the unsuspecting crowd there…..

After leaving Prof Mathew with the mad crowd in the faculty room, who gathered around him like sniffer dogs would do at a crime spot, I left to oblivion… my own place where I took refuge whenever I felt a need to be alone…

The canteen,,,,

It was not empty… the kids were there everywhere…sitting, standing, running ,,…. At GIM that was the only place where they traveled back to their age and had fun, the tie and the formal attire still on…

Teachers in the canteen was not a comfortable sight for many, while some pretended that they hadn’t seen me, others did acknowledge the professor who walked in to spoil there 5 minutes of life between out of life and away from life classes where professors chalked and talked on business, management, ethics and what not….

I just wanted to be alone… and sooner than I expected the kids started running back. Ostensibly some inconsiderate and insensitive professor would be walking out of the faculty room full of fury and info that was waiting to be unloaded…

The tea and banana fry had lost its charm.. ever since I started hitting the GYM I was careful about what I ate…. Thanks to Anand…

Huh… why the hell should I thank him?… deep in my mind is there a fan still alive.. a fan who adored the star ,,,? Who got the smell of denim every time you think of him???

How is Anand sir? … asked some one who stood there right in front blocking my way and my vision….

The canteen manager flashed his pan coated teeth waiting for a reply…

Well… I dragged my foot as if I was searching for words.. I hadn’t got the question right.. and even if I had I wouldn’t know the answer….

Poor Anand sir… what a man he was…. The guy said as he walked back to his corner place where he strategically sat to collect money from the kids who came in groups and left in groups often strategically cheating the guy and putting his numerical and arithmetic abilities into severe testing…

God is so cruel..... he kept lamenting from his chair… Good people get the entire ordeal while the bad ones just grow and keep growing….

I couldn’t take the tea or the banana fry,,, it started tasting bitter… I couldn’t sit there either…

I AM NOT THAT BAD .. I wanted to shout…. But instead decided to walk out…

Cancer at this age… and for him… the guy looked into my face and said, when I paid and tried to move….

Did a sudden torrent of denim overwhelm me…?

Did I cry?

New and Improved !!!

The post exam holidays came to an end so very soon that the kids who came back had the hangover so visibly written over their worried faces. They started coming in one by one and group after group, slowly trickling in to various hostels, some a day in advance and many in the last minute. Notices and instructions appeared at all the notice boards about the does and don’ts that GIM followed as rules and classes got spruced up and all the maintenance work was done. The building just needed its life blood, the kids of GIM to flow in and begin life.

The first day first class fell upon me.. in theory one would get them fresh but after a weeks holiday they were all clearly in no mood for a class- a week was too much for them to get tired and to little to get refreshed…

I had made the lesson plan, the list of readings, the list of assignments and evaluation plan, three days in advance and gave it to the ED( it was mandatory to submit the plan for his approval before the faculty proceeded with it to the first class) who sat over it and analysed it as pig would scan shit…. The ones whom he hated got the bulk of such scrutiny and needless to say Advertising management and sales promotion – my paper took a hell lot of time to get cleared….

Why is this syllabus different from that of this text book? ......He asked me like a police officer, pointing to a relic of a text book on his table…

What is this text book? ......I asked while taking it carefully, and slowly turning its pages afraid of the fact that it was as old as my grand dad and can collapse if I were harsh with it…

It is a classic book, the ideal syllabus and I was surprised that you haven’t included this in your course plan… he said, still the COP like echo added to his questions…

I guess you did study from this at your MBA days… I said with a tint of disdain, which he didn’t get. Instead he beamed and became even more eloquent on why THAT was a reason why I should be teaching from it…

Come on sir… its all gone.. I said with a smile that clearly spilled a can of red paint over his ugly face… your times were different, now it is all changed…

What you mean?..... He asked….

I mean that I have designed the course with my 7 years experience in the industry and with constant up gradation that is done with my corporate connections….....I said and remained silent

Dr Joseph didn’t speak.. Neither did he make any gestures.. I knew I had ill-treated his ego, but he called for it…he was one languorous jackass who never taught a course in the recent past but sat over everyone’s course plan as if he knew every thing of every subject.. Some one some where had to tell him to fuck off and in any case I was not in his good books…

As I left his room, I knew what he will do next … I sat in my cabin expecting a call from the lord of the rings, Dr Jesus, but which never happened…instead called me the King himself in what was literally a jolt…..

The King…? Calling a lesser mortal….?

When I passed through the HQ where the bosses sat in adjacent chambers deciding on the future of management education,Jesus was not there in his cabin… Manohar was there in his but watching some thing in his large LCD TV.. may be some third rate Tamil film which was his passion and probably from where he got inspiration for his funny hair style and his colorful attire, the VC’s chamber was dark- it seemed he didn’t turn up to office that day…and Madam secretary was there, as usual, proud and displaying vanity as if she was the kings wife and not his secretary.

Dr Joy called me… I said with a kind of arrogance and pride which I purposefully and momentarily crafted and oozed out to poke her ego balloon.

She fell for it and stared at me as if it was impossible...... I had a smirk which irritated her even more…

What is it regarding? She asked me….

How would I know,??,, you should ask your boss.. I said with a scorn even as I saw disbelief on her face which bloomed and then erupted… she would never have seen me like that.. why she?… No one had seen this me.. This new me…

In my heart of hearts I thanked just one guy…….who had injected this new found impunity into my blood.. no matter he wasn’t around, I still thought he is seeing me.. and when he is seeing me could I be looking the same old crouching and miserable academic potato?

New and improved Sukesh Menon, walked into the grand doors of the kings chamber mercilessly over a burst balloon which didn’t protest , not even for namesake….

The male gynecologist!!!

Prof Ram was like a senior male gynecologist, he was an expert and knew the thing, but was very rarely in demand. He was never my role model and idea guru but I with awe had admired the courage with which he called spades as spades and not garden tools.. the guts with which he stood up and shouted at enemies who often simply ignored him either by design or by default ….

I but went to him seeking his advise (after a long gap) for the EMEP show management which after the launch fanfare was entirely left to me as my headache. When women gynecologist is not available, don’t we for want of an option accept men??

What is the objective?...... he asked me a question which every prof asked his students who did some project….

I didn’t have an answer, a clear one I mean, just like every other student who did an academic project and happened to be across his or her prof answering funny questions….

You are coordinating it aren’t you? .....asked him with mockery that oozed out of his bearded face…

I didn’t reply... I knew he didn’t expect one….

It is a farce….. he said in a boring monotone…. this whole thing… EMEP and all this humbug….

It wasn’t a new piece of breaking news for me... at GIM it surely was a travesty but I didn’t expect ram to put it so unbolted to me…a hapless me was there before him seeking help and not advises... a me who till the other day was jubilant and whom he had praised as the only outsider to have got chosen to do this job… a me who now was left with no friends to turn to…

Nothing can replace classrooms…Ram kept saying… when we don’t have sufficient time to finish classes you should have known that this will become a burden for you….

Even I agreed to the first part but the second one was disgusting… I didn’t decide.. I didn’t even know and everyone knew how it was blissfully passed on to my unsuspecting head…

Yeah sir… I kept mumbling but my face would have said a NO.. a big NO… I realised it suddenly when Ram got struck… he read my face and knew that my YES meant a NO….

I didn’t mean to hurt you… he said mollifyingly …

Oh yeah… I said to myself but this time smiling as if I was pacified…

What all you have in mind? ….he asked me suddenly

I kept wondering… I for a moment forgot that the topic of discussion was the EMEP programme where I was supposed to engage all the 400 odd MBA guys and gals of GIM every afternoon and with no class rooms and lectures it was challenging for sure but more importantly it was a pain, day in and day out….

Corporate theatre ….The great debate … quizzes….. and what more???

Please present to us a plan… a detailed item to item proposal… we have planned it meticulously ….now the execution has to match it….had said the VC….

We will have sub teams.... lead by faculties and with students implementing it…one day one team… a week five teams… had reminded Jesus…

Other than that I had nothing in my mind….. it was just empty….

Ram couldn’t help much and I sat in the canteen that afternoon with the plan sheets and activity charts that were refusing to take shape. I remembered Anand and his ideas for the programme…the plans we made.. the tsunami of change that EMEP could be bringing to the GIM world,,,,

I missed Anand and his energy… he was the one who began it and then in between disappeared…Why was it that no one missed him?.. no one ever spoke about him?? It was almost 3 days since he had done the vanishing trick and the great change agent was not visible anywhere by his absence… the only one who missed him was me… and may be Sri Laxmi…. Her thought suddenly bought a smile unto my tired face… her face bought a breeze into my barren thoughts.. a drizzle happened on my dry sands of hopelessness..

Yeah man… I patted my own intelligence… I had got it.. the game… I just couldn’t believe that I could be that smart…. In this game of chess, Sri Laxmi was my next move…

Back in office, the plan got ready as dramatic as the launch of the EMEP programme.. I modeled on the management style that never consulted but JUST conveyed… I sent out mails to all the five selected faculty that they will be in charge of one particular afternoon and that is it.. to add to the safety I just added a small clause… "In consultation with the director, it has been decided that you will be the event coordinator for the quiz afternoon/debate afternoon/ "etc…the intelligent ones would understand it, but in GIM they wouldn’t have survived hadn’t they been intelligent….

What is corporate theatre? Sri Laxmi called me over the intercom obviously after having read the mail which proclaimed her role in the EMEP programme…

Why do you sound rude? .....I asked in half romance and half satire…..

Ohhhh... ok then...What is corporate theatre..? she repeated in full satire…

How will I know? .....I asked with a stupid grin that she could see (!) from here cabin some half a kilometer away…

What you mean? you conceived it and you should know… she retorted…

It was the great Anand Mohan who did it… and who better will, than you Madam Sri Laxmi will know of his conceiving abilities?…

You mean to say I got to call Professor Anand and find out?.... She asked, ignoring the double meaning…

Next time when he calls please do…..I said and before I banged the receiver onto its cradle, added… make a plan and give it to me.. you have 24 hours…

I went to Jesus to report on how fast things were moving (and how smart I indeed was) and told him of the plan in a broad outline… he kept calling people, and attending calls,taking printouts, cracking jokes to the women crowd who made his office look like a harem, and when he got time ,in between attending to me in half interest.. It was not my headache whether he got it fully; I just wanted to keep him in the loop…..

Prof Ram was walking frantically next to my cabin, ostensibly in the look out for me… I hadn’t made him an afternoon coordinator, knowing his apathy to the whole issue..

Come on… he dragged me out of the room to a silent corner near the stairs where the GIM world opened to 1,2500 square feet of management education…

Why is Sri Laxmi crying..? he asked me….

What?.... I know I looked stupid, but why was it that the buck stops at me…

What did you tell her…? She was crying and ED was pacifying her… your name was being taken… be careful…. he said and quickly departed….

I didn’t venture to go in… I couldn’t go out either,,,, I stood there alone at the long corridor thinking…..

Why do some guys run behind issues that they know they are not going to solve?

I had no answer.. the closer one was this.....

Why do dogs run behind cars which they know they are not going to drive?